We thought we had seen the height of pointless clunk with the Zihotch rotary watch, but now we have a new favorite: the Port-O-Rotary portable rotary cellphone. Just insert your SIM, and use the big red phone as a cellphone.
It’s damn expensive, at $500, but lemme tell you, that’s a small price to pay to see the looks on the faces of airport security personnel. And, it uses 900MHz/1800MHz/1900MHz frequency bands, so it should work just about anywhere. It comes with a Lithium-Polymer battery that should last about fours days, but you’ll need to unscrew a small plate on the bottom to recharge it. Finally, the ring, as you’d have expected, is also an authentic metal bell.