Lasik At Home, Do-It-Yourself Laser Eye Surgery

diy lasik

By David Ponce

The strangest thing is that this guy doesn’t look like he’s joking at all. He’s for real! He’s actually, really selling an as yet FDA-unapproved do-it-yourself Lasik At Home kit. As in, laser eye surgery, at home.

By yourself.

Yeah, it’s crazy, no? So, for about $100, you can buy this kit that includes the Scal-Pal? (as in, the Scalpel, your pal?), go home, and in four easy steps (Oh, the humanity!), cut a flap of your cornea, and reshape your lens in the comfort of your own bedroom.

The kit comes with

* Scal-Pal? Hand-Operated Combination Femtosecond/Excimer Laser
* Mild sedative (diazepam 4mg)
* No-Blink? brand Eye Drops
* Detailed Instructions and QuickStart Guide
* Protective Post-Op Sleep Mask

The site includes all of three (positive) customer testimonials, a surefire way to induce trust.

And of course, the whole thing could just be some elaborate hoax. You decide.

[Lasik At Home] VIA [Digg]

52 thoughts on “Lasik At Home, Do-It-Yourself Laser Eye Surgery”

  1. It says, “First the Scal-Pal? femtosecond laser cuts a small flap in the cornea of your eye. Then the excimer laser vaporizes a tiny section of the lens without damaging the surrounding tissue.”

    I prefer a Doctor vaporizes my lenses if need be, rather than soumething with “pal” in its name.

  2. Would anyone really buy a product that claims to correct your vision from a guy that is wear corrective lens glasses. Duh? You’d think he would have promoted that it fixed his vision first.. It’s like getting your haircut from a bald guy.

  3. It’s gotta be a hoax. Just in case it wasn’t, I searched for his name (if he was a pioneer in the field, he’d most likely have reports floating around about his research) and couldn’t find anything. Cheacked the FDA approved list of lasers for Lasik, and the “company that makes the the LASIK equipment used by more clinics nationwide” doesn’t have any lasers listed. Also the domain owners are hidden behind godaddy and domains by proxy. But most of all, common sense said this is a joke. (and yes, I’ve got way too much time on my hands)

  4. I don’t know about you, but I tried to “Check Out” with one… on the off chance that it’s for real… but no luck, the back end of the ordering page isn’t there. 😛

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  6. Give me a break. You have to question the sanity of anyone who believes this could even POSSIBLY be real. Not only could you not make a laser powerful enough to burn/cut flesh – even disregarding the parts comprising the rest of the ‘system’ – for under $100, but the liability of such a system is obvious. It only gets more absurd from there….

  7. This is a brilliant hack. Ha! I love the “this statement has not yet been evaluated by the FDA” disclaimer every time the procedure is described as “pain free.”

    The very best hoaxes are those where you’re only 99% sure it’s a hack…

  8. Yeah…in case no one ever noticed, it is actually a hoax. Not a consumer hoax, but a google ad revenue hoax. Basically sites like this are promoting it being seen. The more the site is seen, the more money that site will get from google’s advertisements. Therefore more traffic = more money. You can’t actually even order the kit, namely be because it doesn’t exist…go ahead and click the order button and try it out.

  9. Coming up soon, the at-home-self-abortion kit. Attatches to any home vacuum cleaner, and included is a bottle of 100proof Kentucky moonshine for easing the post-op severe to moderate blood loss. It may not replace lost fluids, but you won’t care if you die as a result of falling for internet quackery!!!

  10. Hehe… someone sent me a link to that site today. I knew immediately it must be a joke but, just to be sure, I tried to order one anyway. Nobody else here seemed to notice that all you have to do is give your prescription for each of your eyes (yea, don’t worry about all that corneal mapping crap… it’s unnecessary, apparently!). So here’s my question… How would the laser know which eye you were working on first? PLUS, if you have taken a “mild sedative”, then can you be trusted to handle a laser????? HAHAHAHA!!!

  11. The only obvious “Joke” is that it was on “Buenas Dias USA”, which not only doesn’t exist, it is a play on “Good Morning, America” in spanish.

  12. Does anyone know what the instrument shown ACTUALLY is? I think it actually is a measuring device used by an optometrist. Possibly for measuring a lens in a set of eyglasses?

  13. Yes, this is an April Fool’s joke, and a bad one at that. I am an eye doctor and I work at a lasik facility. Lasik does not have anything to do with the lens of your eye, it iss the cornea that it is reshaping. If the laser cuts the flap, who then lifts the flap so that the other excimer laser can reshape the eye. Anyone with an ounce of intelligence would have at least made it sound a little more believable. Funny though, I have to admit.

  14. I really hope this is a hoax, and the cartoon that looks like a safety brochure in an airplane makes it looks even more comical. I’m a little scared that the site looks a little bit legit, enough that some idiot might actually fall for it. Also, a normal femtosecond laser to cut a lasik flap costs about a million dollars, and an excimer laser to actually perform the corneal reshaping costs at least 1.3 million, and then a surgeon has to pay the laser company a few hundred dollars every time they perform the surgery. This makes me wonder what kind of laser you would get for $100. Also, keep this in mind when you see an ad for refractive surgery for $300 per eye – it’s bullshit!!

  15. I bought it and was -8.00 in both eyes. Now I never wear glasses and see 20/15 in one eye and 20/10 in the other. Awesome!!!

  16. omfg

    cant you damn BEGIN to IMAGINE ,IF this was real, the lawsuits they,re in for!?

    no one can do self-surgery on much,much less eyes!

  17. Of course it’s real! Fantastic actually. Straight after I used it I could see properly to hook up my home liposuction kit to the vacuum cleaner. God, I look good now and even better I can see myself in the mirror looking better. My kids really enjoyed the mom fat burgers too!

  18. I can’t believe some people are debating whether this is a joke or not. I ordered the product and it worked perfectly for me. Just don’t blink (no blink eyedrops are included).

  19. I am writing this for my husband because while he had his vision, he refused to learn how to type. Now, after this “self surgery” he is blind. Please don’t buy this product, or the knock off being sold in Chicago’s China Town.
    WHich reminds me of the doctor who says to the nervous dad in the waiting room, “I have good news and bad news. THe good news is your wife just gave birth to an 8 lb 4 oz eyeball.”
    “WHat the hell is the bad news, Doc?” the father replied.
    “It’s blind.”

  20. This thing is awesome! The laser zapped away all my wrinkles and zits too. I used to see wrinkles and pimples when I look in the mirror and now I don’t see them…in fact, I don’t see my face in the mirror either…which is kinda strange but wow painless!

  21. Don’t know what you’re all talking about. i work in a laser surgery center but still bought and used the product. worked perfectly. Now i feel bad ripping everybody off at work for $1500/eye when they could have it done at home for a lot less. Oh well, there’s a sucker born every minute

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