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Tag Archives: monsters

Become A Fearless Adult By Taming The Mighty Cthulhu As A Child

Cthulhu-Plush-Toy

Granted, we’re not suggesting you teach your toddler to actually wrestle Cthulhu, especially given that it’s a fictional character. But given its monstrous appearance, it might not be such a bad idea to introduce your child to a giant plush toy fashioned after the creature. If your baby can learn to sleep with a large and heavy tentacled stuffed animal, he may grow up to be of a tougher constitution than a child brought up hugging a yellow sponge with pants. Then again, he may not.. we are not child psychologists and couldn’t be trusted with taking care of anything more complex than a fish, let alone giving parenting advice.

This plush toy is big, and weighs 9.9lbs; it might be better suited as a crib adornment than a huggable teddy bear. But if the mighty Cthulhu tickles your fancy, prepare to pay $460 for the privilege of ownership.

Edit: A concerned parent has pointed out to us that leaving this toy by the crib could present an accidental strangulation hazard. Having no kids ourselves, we would like to make you aware of this and to suggest careful and responsible use, should you decide to buy it.

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Have A Monster In The Closet That Needs Feeding? There Is Salt Made From Tears Of Sorrow, Just For Him

By David Ponce

We’re not quite sure what to make of the range of salts being sold by this London outfit. Called The hoxton Street Monster Supplies, they bill themselves as ” being London’s, and quite possibly the world’s, only purveyor of quality goods for monsters of every kind.” These quality goods include the aforementioned salts, which the company claim are harvested from human tears. There are Salts Made From Tears of Anger, Chopping Onions, Sneezing, Laughter, and Sorrow.

Salt Made From Tears combines centuries-old craft with the freshest human tears which are gently boiled, released into shallow crystallisation tanks, then harvested by hand and finally rinsed in brine. Experience the full range of these flavours in this exclusive collection.

Our guess is that is just sea salt that’s being cleverly marketed; they’d run into a bunch of hygiene and health regulation hurdles otherwise. But what do we know? It might be the real deal. It is £30.00, although they deliver only in the UK for now.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ BuzzFeed ]