If you’re a communist your kids aren’t going to grow up sharing your unique political ideologies playing with a Wooly Willy now are they? That’s why you need to replace the classic version of that toy with this ‘Create A Commie’ version instead. Just like with Willy you use a magnetic wand to position metal filings over the starting face to make eyebrows, mustaches, beards and even odd birthmarks.
Since the governments of the world are more concerned with terrorists than commies these days you also won’t have to worry about your children being black listed if they’re caught putting a hilarious mustache on Lenin, or tweaking Castro’s beard till it’s just right. The packaging even includes drawings of everyone’s favorite communists you can use for reference. I have to admit it’s quite interesting how the generic starting face can be used to accurately recreate so many famous communists… Coincidence!?!?
Wondering what to get your spoiled niece or nephew for their birthday? How about Nothing. Having trouble deciding on a gift for your friend’s 8th wedding shower? Might I suggest getting them Nothing. Or what about that Secret Santa where you drew the name of the guy who keeps stealing your lunch at work? Well I think it’s pretty clear that Nothing would make the perfect gift.
Besides maybe a mouthful of oxygen this clear acrylic sphere contains absolutely nothing. And to be honest it already seems like the perfect gift for a lot of people I know. Even the packaging is simple black and grey text on a stark white background that explains to the giftee that they have indeed just received absolutely Nothing as a gift.
And while the Nothing part might be free the packaging will apparently set you back about $6.28 from I Want One Of Those. That’s right, someone, somewhere is swimming in a pile of money because they thought of the idea to sell Nothing. I know what they’re getting from me for Christmas this year.
Noticed anything odd yesterday? We did. It was April’s Fool all over the place, and people were having fun. Here are just a few examples:
R/C Battlefish
Each Piranhaz set comes with two battle fish, equipped with their own laser cannon. A quick charge from the remote and each fish is ready to go. Squeeze their sides to turn them on (you’ll see the eyes light up) and put them in the Arena. They will suck in a little water for ballast (just like a submarine). And then…FIGHT! Please use with caution when playing in fish tank with live fish - the lasers can blind them.
Google today announced the launch of Google TiSP (BETA)™, a free in-home wireless broadband service that delivers online connectivity via users’ plumbing systems. The Toilet Internet Service Provider (TiSP) project is a self-installed, ad-supported online service that will be offered entirely free to any consumer with a WiFi-capable PC and a toilet connected to a local municipal sewage system. “I couldn’t be more excited about, and am only slightly grossed out by, this remarkable new product,” said Marissa Mayer, Google’s Vice President of Search Products and User Experience. “I firmly believe TiSP will be a breakthrough product, particularly for those users who, like Larry himself, do much of their best thinking in the bathroom.”
Available for free (unless you want professional installation or the Enterprise version) from Google.
Walk into any prank or gag store and you’ll come to the realization that golf courses must be some of the most hilarious places on earth. There’s exploding or remote control golf balls, zany club covers and of course the never ending and always funny references to the ‘19th hole.’
Adding to the tradition of non-stop hilarity on the greens is the Pop Up! golf prank which appears to be a small spring loaded device that will cause a ball to come shooting back out of a hole after it’s fallen in. Of course you’ll need a clever distraction in order to slip the Pop Up! into the hole without anyone seeing but once it’s there you can be sure your prank will go down in the annals of golf history.
The Pop Up! is available from Bim Bam Banana for $18.
Normally I wouldn’t have any reason to write about MAD magazine but now that they’ve included the last 50+ years on a DVD archive I feel it’s worth a mention. In fact I was actually surprised to hear the magazine has been in production for over 50 years now. My father used to buy them when I was younger and I still remember laughing at their parodies of popular 80’s sitcoms like Different Strokes and M.A.S.H. even though I was too young to understand half the jokes.
While previous archives have been available on multiple CD-ROMs it meant a lot of disk swapping was in order as you read through the archives. This new version on DVD should be a bit easier to use and includes 600 complete cover to cover issues which equals about 17,500 scanned pages.
The Absolutely MAD archive is available on Amazon.com for $39.99.
Lenovo, the Chinese personal computer company who bought IBM’s PC division back in 2004, has leaked some test footage of next generation laptops on, uh, a secret page on their UK corporate website. Seriously, it’s totally top secret, and is in no way a promotion for the Thinkpad’s current impact protection system, spill resistant keyboard, or fingerprint reader. So don’t tell anyone.
I’m going be mature about this subject and refrain from making any obvious remarks about internet porn. Instead, I’m going to talk about mousepads that emulate skirts and boobies.
This “mmmousepad” was designed by Lowe Dubai, and distributed to internet cafes in the United Arab Emirates as part of a marketing campaign for Axe. Apparently, it was successful. And, when combined with the Busty Mousepad, you’ve got a complete girl. Or something nearly as good. Right?
Maybe this would be a good time for me to preemptively duck.
[Yes, we know this is a year old. Please no hate mail; we still think it's cool. -Ed.]
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By Andrew Liszewski
By Andrew Liszewski
By Andrew Liszewski
