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Tag Archives: gag

Pizza Wrapping Paper Is Perfect For The Holidays


You spend a lot of time thinking about what gifts to buy your loved ones over the Holidays, but let’s face it, you usually just grab whatever wrapping paper they have at the local drug store and call it a day. Taking the time to select carefully shows that extra touch of care, and what better way to show your love than you have your presents wrapped in paper that looks exactly like NYC style pizza? The Gift Couture Pizza Wrapping Paper is a Kickstarter that pitches just that, a pizza-patterned wrapping paper made from 30% post-consumer waste, acid free and archival quality. A $20 pledge will get you 2 sheets of paper, 2 pizza boxes and 2 labels. The sheet measures 18″ by 24″, and the box is 6″ X 6″ X 1.75″.


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Never-Ending Birthday Card Goes On and On and On

Never Ending Birthday Card

The Never-Ending Birthday Card is the card you should give to frenemies, friends, and family who you want to annoy the crap out of– but while still being endearing– at the same time. The card starts playing as soon as its opened, and as its name suggests, it won’t stop until it runs out of juice. That’s an estimated 3 hours of playing time, which should be enough to drive most people bonkers.

The best part? There’s no way to stop it, because it will keep on playing even if you tear, submerge, or burn the card. How’s that for dedication?

The Never-Ending Birthday Card is available for £9.99 (~$16.)

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‘Tiny Hands’ Gives You Creepily Small Hands–Well, Sort Of

Tiny Hands


No, there’s nothing wrong with that dude’s hands. You should be able to tell easily if you look closely, because they’re clearly made from plastic. What he actually has is a pair of Tiny Hands and it’s exactly what its name says it is. Molded from plastic, you can use these unusually small plastic human hands to pull pranks, scare the bejeezus out of people, and shoot some pretty gnarly photos.

There isn’t anything particularly funny about a person’s hands. Unless, of course, they’re about five times too small for their body. The set includes one right and one left miniature mitt so you can make a silly salute, give a hilarious high-five, and maybe even pop some bubbles on the Lawrence Welk show.

Tiny Hands are available for $8.99.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Laughing Squid ]

Fooled Ya: Chocolate Lumps Of Coal

Chocolate Lumps Of Coal


For this holiday season, don’t be a grinch and give someone the gift of coals– chocolate lumps of coal, that is. That’s what they might look like at first glance, but you’ll soon realize that they’re just delectable chunks of chocolate wrapped in a not-so-appetizing package. To ward off kids and prying fingers, maybe?

Each package holds three lumps of chocolate wrapped in shiny black foil. They’re available online for $8.

[ Product Page ] VIA TIWIB ]

Beware of H2O: Scientific Side Effects Water Bottle

Scientific Side Effects Water Bottle


Water is more dangerous than you think…not. Okay, so it could be, but only if you consume hideously excessive amounts of it in a short span of time. So fool a couple of people of people who don’t really know the facts about H2O by pranking– er, gifting– them with one of these ‘Scientific Side Effects Water’ bottle. A bold warning about what happens if you drink too much water is printed on the side.

It reads: “May cause diaphoresis, micturation, and acute tissue hydration.” In normal human speak, that translates to: “May cause you to sweat, pee, and be adequately hydrated.” Doesn’t sound so dire now, does it?

It’s available online for $18.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ TIWIB ]

This’ll Scare the Crap Out of You: Horror Story Toilet Paper

Horror Story Toilet Paper

Done reading all of the books and comics you’ve stashed in the bathroom? Then here’s one bathroom reader that might just literally scare the crap out of you: the Horror Story toilet paper roll. Sorry if that was a bit too graphic for you, but I just couldn’t resist. This is basically a roll of toilet paper with a scarier-than-though story printed on it.

The horrific tales are penned by Koji Suzuki, who’s known for writing the “Ring” and “Spiral” series. They’re sold in sets of three, with each one featuring a different story.

They’re available online for £9.99 (or about $17.)

[ Product Page ] VIA [ TIWIB ]

Modest Urns for Modest (and Cheap) People

Modest Urns

These Modest Urns by Archie McPhee are a novelty or joke at best. I think. They’re McPhee’s “most modestly priced receptacle” which can hold up to 62.8 cubic inches of ashes or whatever else you want to put into it. I say “ashes” because they’re being marketed as uber-affordable urns for your ashes, your pet’s ashes, or for whoever else’s ashes. For all intents and purposes, it should be able to get the job done.

Each Modest Urn is priced at $9.50. If you want to be even cheaper more modest, then you can get one of these for free (well, almost) by buying a can of coffee and recycling it when all the coffee’s gone. Because yes, as we can all clearly see, the Modest Urn is basically a decorated coffee can.Continue Reading

Flick Candles: Scented Candles for Life’s Disappointments


Life is a roller coaster of highs and lows with a bevy of unexpected twists and turns in between. It helps to keep calm and get some perspective during those low points. Whether it’s a cup of tea or a walk in the park, even the simplest of things can be signs to remind you that life will get better. And if the Flicking Candle Company had their way, then you’ll be lighting one of their candles while sipping that cup of tea and getting over your disappointment.

Their candles are far from ordinary because they offer special candles targeted at specific disappointments, which include Freshly Signed Divorce Papers, Cancelled Vacation, and the Friend Zone.

Flick Candles1

Flick Candles2

Flick Candles3

Flick Candles4

Flicking Candles make the perfect gift for friends and family, especially if they’re going through a hard time. There is no better way to subtly acknowledge their personal setbacks than with a candle that illuminates those challenges and puts them on display for everyone to see. They’ll be happy to own a fragrance that truly captures life and all its disappointments.


Out of all the candles they’re offering, Grandma’s Last Christmas Tree is probably the most most depressing one. Each candle retails for $16.99.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Laughing Squid ]

YankMe Candles Bring Disgusting Scents Like ‘Dutch Oven’ to Your Home–Well, Sort Of!

YankMe Candle


Can you imagine lighting up a candle that smells like urinal mints or skid marks? What about dutch oven and dog vomit-scented candles? Not very appealing, are they? These are exactly what the labels of YankMe Candles say, and those are the scents that’ll hit you the moment you open the lid.

Who in their right mind would buy candles with such unpleasant scents? Nobody, obviously. YankMe knows that, and they’re only yanking your chain because the candles don’t really smell like what their labels claim once you burn them. There’s actually smelly disc on the inside that’s emanating the stink of urinals and farts, but once you get that out of the way, you’ll be treated to soothing scents that you’d expect from a regular ol’ candle.

The candles retail for $14.99 each.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ This Is Why I’m Broke ]