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Tag Archives: babies

Tactical Baby Carrier Tells The World Your Parenting Means Business

Mission-Critical-Baby-Carrier

This is a baby carrier that features a MOLLE system to attach… stuff to it. It’s made from a 1000D Nylon and meets ASTM F2236-14 regulations for baby carriers. Heck, it looks like something a SWAT team would wear, except it’s your baby you stuff inside. It’s awesome!

The Mission Critical Baby Carrier is a front carry baby carrier. Simple, intuitive design makes it easy to put on and secure your baby. Baby can face in or out, depending on their stage of development. It features a removable and washable liner, hidden hood, MOLLE straps for customization, and a unique secure vest design allowing full freedom of hands and mobility.

– For Babies approx 8-35 lbs
– 1000D Nylon outer construction
– Meets ASTM F2236-14 regulations for baby carriers
– YKK zippers
– Sun shield
– MOLLE attachment front and back
– Weight 36.5 oz

But being the most badass dad on the block will cost you. The Mission Critical Baby Carrier is $190.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Werd ]

Corner Protectors Are Cute As Buttons

corner-protectors

New kid in the house? Might want to do something about those pointy table corners he’s inevitably going to smash into the second he starts walking. While we always advocate duct tape (duct tape FTW always and ever), there are those of you who don’t share our home improvement style. That’s fine. For you, maybe there is these cute Safety Bumper Corner Protectors. They’re made of foam, adhere with included 3M double-sided tape, and are shaped like ether a cat, a frog, or a bear. When they’re covering a corner, they also look like they’re devouring the table, which a tiny human is going to appreciate, we guarantee it. At $4.38 for 2 pieces, it’s a steal.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ ThatsNerdALicious ]

Get’Em Hooked Early: Beer Bottle-Shaped Baby Bottle

baby-beer-bottle

Just imagine the horrified looks you’ll get when people see your toddler chugging from his ‘Chill, Baby – Lil’Lager Baby Bottle’. It’s not an actual beer bottle, in case you’re not getting it. It’s just a BPA-free, phthalate-free plastic bottle with a food-grade silicone nipple that you fill with baby formula. It’s funny, but you better hope that the people that see your child drinking from it share your sense of humour, or you might be getting a surprise visit from Child Services. If you’re confident you can get away with it, you can pre-order the thing for $12.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Geekologie ]

Cradle ‘n Swing Lets Parents Take Care Of Their Baby From Afar

CBV76-4-in-1-smart-connect-cradle-n-swing-bru-d-2

Lazy parents everywhere, listen up: Fisher Price has released a baby cradle does all the rocking for you. That’s right, with the 4-in-1 Smart Connect™ Cradle ’n Swing, if you hear baby crying, instead of going over like a responsible adult, just whip out your smartphone and rock them from afar!

SmartSwing Technology offers 6 distinct swinging speeds from low to high so you can find the perfect rhythm to help soothe baby, whether swinging side-to-side (like a cradle) or head-to-toe. 16 songs, 3 nature sounds, and deluxe overhead mobile with light-up birdies (one with a mirrored belly) help keep baby entertained for hours!

Of course you can rationalize this $200 purchase by telling yourself you’re being “efficient” rather than lazy. And maybe you have a point. It’s not like bonding with your child is important or anything…

CBV76-4-in-1-smart-connect-cradle-n-swing-bru-d-3

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Gizmag ]

SaddleBaby Frees Your Hands, Keeps Your Little One Safe

SaddleBaby

The reproductive act brings about the existence of miniature versions of your self. This much is clear. And it’s also a given that sooner of later, these mini-yous will want to sit on your shoulders and use you as a horsey. That too is clear, and it’s fine, except for the fact that safety dictates you hold their mini-feet so they don’t fall off your horse shoulders. How do you take a call? How do you do anything? That’s where the SaddleBaby comes in. It’s a harness that straps around your chest and gives your child a cushy seat atop your shoulders. More importantly, it binds their feet so they don’t fall while they’re getting their ride. So now you can walk around, post pictures to Facebook, Instagram your breakfast, take a call, or even flail your arms around for no reason, all the while being a not-completely-irresponsible parent. Any device that helps us be better parents with less effort is fine by us. It’s $90 and totally worth it, in our opinion.

SaddleBaby-1

[ Product Page ] VIA [ LikeCool ]

Creepy: Company Will 3D Print A Replica Of Your Unborn Fetus

3d-printed-fetus-1

We ran a story similar to this over a year ago but this product is slightly different. A company called 3D Babies will ask you to send them between 1 and 5 ultrasound images of your baby and they’ll create a 3D replica which “resembles” your fetus. Given the fact that the 3D print is based on customer submitted images, we’ll really emphasize “resemble” as we don’t except the accuracy to be very high. $200 will get you a small, $400 a medium and $600 a “full-size” 8 inch print. 8 inches apparently being the average size of a 23-24 week old fetus. You can also pick two, uh, poses. Either in fetal position or with arms and legs outstretched.

There’s no contortion of reason that will make this be anything but utterly creepy to us. But what do we know? 3D printing is revolutionizing the world (in a manner), but no one said it would always remain on the good size of the creep zone.

And if you don’t believe our reservations, hit the jump for a bunch more pictures that should drive the point home.

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Power Ranger Onesies for Your Little Power Ranger

Power Ranger Onesies Remember the good old days when you’d sing to theme of Power Rangers as the live action program began on television? The show has evolved over the years (it went back on air last February with Power Rangers Megaforce.) It’s got a lot more competition on the small screen but if you grew up with the crew, then there’ll always be that spot that nothing else can replace.

Start your child on the path of righteousness early by dressing them up in these adorable Power Rangers onesies! They might not grow up to love the show as much as you did, but you can always teach them a thing or two about what the Rangers stand for while they’re in their Ranger garb.

Available in blue, green, black, yellow, red, and pink. Where’s the onesie for the White Ranger?

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Incredible Things ]

Baby Seat With iPad Stand: Genius Idea Or Worst Baby Brainwashing Garbage Evar?

ipad-apptivity-seat

This is a baby seat by Fisher-Price called iPad Apptivity Seat. It features an articulated arm with a 7 inch mirror at the end, which can be removed and replaced with an iPad. Genius, right? The iPad will then hover right in front of your baby’s face, which apparently is enough of a bad idea to have some people’s heads explode. At least the people in the review section on Amazon. See, even though it states in the product description that the associated application (which you download off the App store and run on the iPad) limits the viewing time to 12-15 minutes, angry parents are screaming bloody murder anyway because it’s apparently super bad to have your baby stare at a screen for extended periods of time. But… it says right there on the description that the application was developed with child development experts, and it times out after a short while, so we’re not sure what the hubbub is about.

Once your toddler gets older, you can then introduce other age appropriate applications, with letters and numbers and sing-alongs and stuff that kids that age enjoy. So we’re thinking the iPad Apptivity Seat is just fine as long as you use it in the way it was designed. Should it be banned (as some reviewers suggest!) because it might encourage some parents to be irresponsible and just play Spongebob on repeat all day? We’re not sure, but if you’re mature enough to handle it, the seat is $75.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ Geekologie ]

Turn Your Baby Into A Tiny Human Burrito

Tortilla-Baby-2

You’re looking at a circular piece of cloth that is 40 inches across. It looks like a tortilla and if you wrap your infant in it, he’ll look like a burrito faster than you can say ‘Taco Bell’. That’s cute, and who doesn’t like cute? It’s half polyester, half cotton and the only colour it comes in is “flour”. It’ll cost ya all of $48.

[ Product Page ] VIA [ ThatsNerdALicious ]