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Lasik At Home, Do-It-Yourself Laser Eye Surgery

diy lasik

By David Ponce

The strangest thing is that this guy doesn’t look like he’s joking at all. He’s for real! He’s actually, really selling an as yet FDA-unapproved do-it-yourself Lasik At Home kit. As in, laser eye surgery, at home.

By yourself.

Yeah, it’s crazy, no? So, for about $100, you can buy this kit that includes the Scal-Pal? (as in, the Scalpel, your pal?), go home, and in four easy steps (Oh, the humanity!), cut a flap of your cornea, and reshape your lens in the comfort of your own bedroom.

The kit comes with

* Scal-Pal? Hand-Operated Combination Femtosecond/Excimer Laser
* Mild sedative (diazepam 4mg)
* No-Blink? brand Eye Drops
* Detailed Instructions and QuickStart Guide
* Protective Post-Op Sleep Mask

The site includes all of three (positive) customer testimonials, a surefire way to induce trust.

And of course, the whole thing could just be some elaborate hoax. You decide.

[Lasik At Home] VIA [Digg]

  • Heurrgh!

    i bpught pne amd it worked finE. hIghly recommended/

  • Rohan

    Oof, either this is a late april fool’s or the world’s idiot count just went up again.

  • Tanya Palta

    Thank You. I think I’ll stick to my contacts for now!

  • http://inventit.blogspot.com nar

    It says, “First the Scal-Pal? femtosecond laser cuts a small flap in the cornea of your eye. Then the excimer laser vaporizes a tiny section of the lens without damaging the surrounding tissue.”

    I prefer a Doctor vaporizes my lenses if need be, rather than soumething with “pal” in its name.

  • robbo

    Would anyone really buy a product that claims to correct your vision from a guy that is wear corrective lens glasses. Duh? You’d think he would have promoted that it fixed his vision first.. It’s like getting your haircut from a bald guy.

  • chris

    It’s gotta be a hoax. Just in case it wasn’t, I searched for his name (if he was a pioneer in the field, he’d most likely have reports floating around about his research) and couldn’t find anything. Cheacked the FDA approved list of lasers for Lasik, and the “company that makes the the LASIK equipment used by more clinics nationwide” doesn’t have any lasers listed. Also the domain owners are hidden behind godaddy and domains by proxy. But most of all, common sense said this is a joke. (and yes, I’ve got way too much time on my hands)

  • http://www.therantsheet.com Jawn Lam

    Why is the doctor still wearing glasses?

  • NetGeek

    Next up…the Home Vasectomy Kit!!!

  • ROMzombie

    I don’t know about you, but I tried to “Check Out” with one… on the off chance that it’s for real… but no luck, the back end of the ordering page isn’t there. πŸ˜›

  • N/E

    Mild sedative (diazepam 4mg) ???? so, it ships with valium… yeah, it’s BS

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  • http://www.divxcodecs.com skepTic

    Give me a break. You have to question the sanity of anyone who believes this could even POSSIBLY be real. Not only could you not make a laser powerful enough to burn/cut flesh – even disregarding the parts comprising the rest of the ‘system’ – for under $100, but the liability of such a system is obvious. It only gets more absurd from there….

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  • Deb G.

    This is a brilliant hack. Ha! I love the “this statement has not yet been evaluated by the FDA” disclaimer every time the procedure is described as “pain free.”

    The very best hoaxes are those where you’re only 99% sure it’s a hack…

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  • thirdman

    What a hoot! Whoever thought this (joke) up is a genius!

  • http://richie4360 Richard Cohen

    It’s definitely a joke! Did you notice that the “Doctor” pictured… IS WEARING GLASSES!

  • Schreckles

    Yeah…in case no one ever noticed, it is actually a hoax. Not a consumer hoax, but a google ad revenue hoax. Basically sites like this are promoting it being seen. The more the site is seen, the more money that site will get from google’s advertisements. Therefore more traffic = more money. You can’t actually even order the kit, namely be because it doesn’t exist…go ahead and click the order button and try it out.

  • rafdalori

    Coming up soon, the at-home-self-abortion kit. Attatches to any home vacuum cleaner, and included is a bottle of 100proof Kentucky moonshine for easing the post-op severe to moderate blood loss. It may not replace lost fluids, but you won’t care if you die as a result of falling for internet quackery!!!

  • speedshark

    Hehe… someone sent me a link to that site today. I knew immediately it must be a joke but, just to be sure, I tried to order one anyway. Nobody else here seemed to notice that all you have to do is give your prescription for each of your eyes (yea, don’t worry about all that corneal mapping crap… it’s unnecessary, apparently!). So here’s my question… How would the laser know which eye you were working on first? PLUS, if you have taken a “mild sedative”, then can you be trusted to handle a laser????? HAHAHAHA!!!

  • bunny rabbit

    Why can’t we just enjoy the joke? And don’t blink.

  • joobus

    it’s an april fool’s prank you morons.

  • Linthorn

    The only obvious “Joke” is that it was on “Buenas Dias USA”, which not only doesn’t exist, it is a play on “Good Morning, America” in spanish.

  • bcarlton

    Does anyone know what the instrument shown ACTUALLY is? I think it actually is a measuring device used by an optometrist. Possibly for measuring a lens in a set of eyglasses?

  • Eric

    Yes, this is an April Fool’s joke, and a bad one at that. I am an eye doctor and I work at a lasik facility. Lasik does not have anything to do with the lens of your eye, it iss the cornea that it is reshaping. If the laser cuts the flap, who then lifts the flap so that the other excimer laser can reshape the eye. Anyone with an ounce of intelligence would have at least made it sound a little more believable. Funny though, I have to admit.

  • The Bushman

    As with all unbelievably weird crap, check it on snopes.com:

  • Matt

    I really hope this is a hoax, and the cartoon that looks like a safety brochure in an airplane makes it looks even more comical. I’m a little scared that the site looks a little bit legit, enough that some idiot might actually fall for it. Also, a normal femtosecond laser to cut a lasik flap costs about a million dollars, and an excimer laser to actually perform the corneal reshaping costs at least 1.3 million, and then a surgeon has to pay the laser company a few hundred dollars every time they perform the surgery. This makes me wonder what kind of laser you would get for $100. Also, keep this in mind when you see an ad for refractive surgery for $300 per eye – it’s bullshit!!

  • K. Con

    I bought it and was -8.00 in both eyes. Now I never wear glasses and see 20/15 in one eye and 20/10 in the other. Awesome!!!

  • Devon


    cant you damn BEGIN to IMAGINE ,IF this was real, the lawsuits they,re in for!?

    no one can do self-surgery on much,much less eyes!

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  • Micha

    HAHA! DON’T BLINK! It’s genius if you ask me.

  • Doctor Nick

    Hello Everybody… Some people think this is a scam.. I assure you its completely safe.

  • Doris

    Of course it’s real! Fantastic actually. Straight after I used it I could see properly to hook up my home liposuction kit to the vacuum cleaner. God, I look good now and even better I can see myself in the mirror looking better. My kids really enjoyed the mom fat burgers too!

  • zombie

    This is not mine, but it’s damn funny.
    “Remember to remove the laser from your eye before vaporizing your neighbor.”

  • http://www.lasikeyes33.info/. erica

    Is a good joke, I don’t think no one can do it ;*)

  • Blind Bruce

    I can’t believe some people are debating whether this is a joke or not. I ordered the product and it worked perfectly for me. Just don’t blink (no blink eyedrops are included).

  • http://www.youtube.com/thewinekone thewinekone

    i’d go with bruce, it also worked for me, their website is kinda not working. you have to email them and theyd give u details on how to order it via email. good luck

  • rwei

    Thanks man, i agree

  • http://greatbaths.com Peter Pretzel

    I am writing this for my husband because while he had his vision, he refused to learn how to type. Now, after this “self surgery” he is blind. Please don’t buy this product, or the knock off being sold in Chicago’s China Town.
    WHich reminds me of the doctor who says to the nervous dad in the waiting room, “I have good news and bad news. THe good news is your wife just gave birth to an 8 lb 4 oz eyeball.”
    “WHat the hell is the bad news, Doc?” the father replied.
    “It’s blind.”

  • GI Joe

    This thing is awesome! The laser zapped away all my wrinkles and zits too. I used to see wrinkles and pimples when I look in the mirror and now I don’t see them…in fact, I don’t see my face in the mirror either…which is kinda strange but wow painless!

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  • Micky

    Don’t know what you’re all talking about. i work in a laser surgery center but still bought and used the product. worked perfectly. Now i feel bad ripping everybody off at work for $1500/eye when they could have it done at home for a lot less. Oh well, there’s a sucker born every minute

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  • Larry Lewis

    My eyes were permanently damaged due to real Lasik. Be careful when choosing your Lasik surgeon!

  • Toby Weston Vee